Why blog about gender?

Why blog about gender and sexuality? Honestly, I feel that bullet points are the most appropriate way to address this question, as I find it requires a certain urgency. So, here are a  few quick reasons:

• Because we so demean everything woman and feminine that even a girl addressing other girls will say ‘you guys.’
• Because we label ‘third-world’ countries as backwards when many of them (Burma, India) have had strong female leaders in office, while in the United States we are dealing with politicians who are making the claims for what constitutes  ‘legitimate rape‘ and female political representation so pathetic that we rank 90th out of 186 countries world-wide.
• Because despite increased media visibility, hate crimes against transgender and gay people are on the rise.
• And because when a transgendered boy is killed with a gun by a fellow classmate, he is blamed for the murder by a mainstream news magazine.
• Because the average cost of a wedding is $25,000. Because there are like 6 wedding reality shows on television. Because despite the high number of divorces and abused and neglected children, we still value straight marriage as sacred and normative.
• Because, despite the fear about women’s changing roles, divorce rates are actually declining among my generation due to women’s increased involvement in the workforce and men’s increased involvement in the domestic sphere.
• Because men can’t enjoy fashion without being thought of as gay. Because a guy couldn’t enjoy a close friendship in public with another guy until a recent film made it OK.
• Because a book and film about a girl who gives up her life for a vampire was adored by girls and young women around the world. Because it’s important to not dismiss these fantasies and because feminism exists in even contradictory places (see: my blog on fashion :))
• Because I think we need to examine why submissiveness is required for women in religious texts, but not for men.
• Because the marriage equality debate is just as much about people’s discomfort with subverting traditional gender roles as it is with homophobia.
• Because protesting for feminism in Russia will get you two years in jail.
• Because 200 million girls have been killed worldwide simply because they were born a girl.
• Because a reality-show family of 19 children in which the daughters are not allowed to freely pursue their own career path is being heralded by national media publications as a charming example of ‘good family values.’
• Because if we define someone’s gender by their genitalia, then what does that say about how we think about God?
• Because a young Harvard blogger who was trying to start a candid dialogue about sex and gender was slut shamed into silence.
• Because street harassment is a normal part of many women’s day, like brushing your teeth and eating breakfast.
• Because fashion advertisers think rape is trendy.
• Because Sex and the City’s mantra was that an empowered, financially independent woman is able to buy lots of designer things. And because that theme of empowerment was completely blind-sighted by the millions of women workers who are exploited every day in factories overseas to make these designer items.
• Because we all (even the most critical of us), women and men, queer and straight, engage in the very things that we find problematic and regressive, like The Real Housewives, and designer labels, and patriarchial religions, and watching sexist music videos, and giving into societal pressures that dictates what we wear and who we fall in love with and what careers we choose and how we live our lives. And we need to have conversations about why we make these choices, and most importantly, I need to figure out why I can’t stop watching “The Housewives.”   Ultimately, this blog will be my space for therapy 😉

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